Most Stuf Oreos Are Real And They Are Spectacular
Mother of God. Whenever a story about a new Oreo product hits Twitter, I immediately become skeptical because there are always hooligans spreading #FakeNews about some crazy Oreo flavor that immediately makes me want to vomit.
Or that Oreo is finally going full Heisenberg on us by killing the cookie and giving us only creme stuffing.
Nope, it turns out those are all bullshit.
However these Most Stuf Oreos are very real and available for sale at Wal-Mart, since that’s the exact kind of place people who need to load up on gigantic Oreos shop.
You hear that? That’s the sound of insulin prices shooting through the roof. Now of course I want to see and try these monstrosities myself just because they are a modern manmade marvel just like the Great Wall or the fake dick Mark Wahlberg had in Boogie Nights. However, I will admit that there may be too much Stuf in there for an enjoyable Oreo cookie. I think Double Stufs actually nailed the ratio perfectly. Anything less than a Double Stuf feels light in the trousers and anything more like Mega Stuf is like a bukakke of creme. I know there are Oreo purists out there that like the original Oreos or Oreo thins, but they are pretty much vegans in my mind and probably support PETA. But as Oreo continues to pump in more Stuf, you realize just how important the wafer is to the delicate balance of the Oreo. The creme is clearly MJ, but the cookie is definitely Pippen and Double Stuf is the 96 Bulls.
So well done Oreo. You have done did it again until you release a Super Duper Stuf that is literally just six gigantic cookies like the one on the cover of these Most Stufs.
Now have some balls and release Just Stuf in a tube that people can eat with a spoon. I’m not even saying this because I want to have it, either. I would never buy that because I know my limits. Buying a tube of Just Stuf is like trying crack for the first time. I may not die that day, but I will be going down a dark road that will likely kill me and I don’t want any part of it.
This blog was written in memory of Snackin’ Off.
I’m still not over the camera missing that snag. RIP In Peace Snackin’ Off. Time to go down a 15 Second Food Review rabbit hole to make myself feel better (at least until I gorge 5 of these Most Stuf Oreos and feel sick to my stomach).
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P.S. Shout out to the GOAT grocery store for selling these since game respect game. Have at it, New York and Connecticut Stoolies.